“Dorothy – are you looking up pornography on that goddamned pervert machine again?” – Sheldon

 Air Way Bill for dorothydavidDate: Mon, Mar 2, 2015 at 3:40 AM

Beneficiary: Dorothy Yaeger.

Fill in the attached FORM and return with your proof of I’D and a utility bill in your name.

David White.

dorothyDate: Mon, Mar 2, 2015 at 1:38 PM


I did not anticipate needing to provide this information. Wish Somebody had told me earlier. I apologize It will take me a minute to Obtain my Identity Card. I can’t drive anymore so There is no use of me carrying a Drivers License. I Used to buy Liquor, frequently, due to Mr Yaeger passing a few years ago, there was nothing else for me to do… but through a sad series of events, and one DUI/time in jail, I realized I am an Alcoholic. Turns out they don’t really like keeping old people in jail – ha ha. Anyway. Once I finished Rehab, my daughter took away  my IDs to prohibit me from buying alcohol anymore. I guess that is probably for the best, but certainly not convenient in this  Situation.

Please be Patient with me, as I need to contact her and see if I can convince her that I am sober and need my ID for Other purposes.

God Bless,

dorothyDate: Tue, Mar 3, 2015 at 6:54 PM


I have attached 3 documents for you

God Bless,


 davidDate: Fri, Mar 6, 2015 at 6:26 AM

Beneficiary: Dorothy B. Yaeger.

The consignment has arrived at JFK airport at 7.45am this morning, send me your direct telephone number now for the delivery attache to contact you now.

David White.

Date: Fri, Mar 6, 2015 at 12:05 PMdorothy


Screen Shot 2016-02-24 at 11.04.40 PM

David White received the number for a women’s shelter.

I can be reached at most hours at: (718)-nine-two-two-____ (Beatrice said to write it out so the government can’t read it). Do you have any idea of what time they were thinking of stopping by?? ?

Thank you David, can you tell your son Mr. White that he’s been so helpful??

God Bless,
Mrs. Dorothy Beatrice Yaeger

 davidDate: Fri, Mar 6, 2015 at 3:32 PM

Beneficiary: Dorothy.

I am surprised that the phone number your supplied is for a care Centre, the delivery official that arrived with your consignment is still at the airport.

I have been going through your emails and I think you are operating under false identity, if it inspected and cash shipment discovered it will bring a lot of problems and you are the sole beneficiary.

Also note that the number you supplied was answered and there is no record of Dorothy Yaeger in the care Centre.

Here is the number of the delivery attache call him now to finalize delivery arrangements. 940-603-6879

I have 3 lovely daughters and no son, so I don’t know where you getting the wrong information from.


Date: Sat, Mar 7, 2015 at 10:37 AM


I’m so sorry for having missed your call. I don’t know if you have them in The England, but that number is for a women’s shelter. I didn’t want to burden you with my sad story, but let me explain…

MR YAEGER passed away a few years ago, and I took up drinking alcohol. I went to AA (Alcoholics Anonymous). I met a man there named CHAD GUY.

I should have been more careful, but at this age it really is hard to find anyone that is sexually attracted to you (pardon my French!) I am 46 years his senior. Things were going so well… I would have never expected something like this. Sometimes he makes fun of me, but most of the time he has been Really Sweet and so patient with me and my Alzheimer’s.

I knew the large money could be really bad because people might Try to take it from me. So I kept it a Secret. But I foolishly left my computer on at my home and forgot to Sign Out of my email. He read all of my emails, and he knows about the $24 million.

He demanded that I give him half of it, and I Said no. I refuse. and he has been physically abusive ever since. He stays at my home and I can’t call the Police. Can you imagine me saying “My boyfriend beats me because I am expecting money from Libya that was laundered from Gandaffi?” They would seize me and plus they would probably take all the money. So I cannot go to the Police, but I also can’t get CHAD GUY out of my apartment.

I really don’t have a permanent residence… I have been staying at the women’s shelter you called. Because I was not there, DAVID WHITE, it is illegal for them to give out personal information. That’s why they told you I had never been there.

You make me very scared DAVID WHITE. Your email sounds like we are going to get in legal trouble. Do you think it is best I just stop contacting you altogether? It sounds like you are very angry with me.

I’m sorry for the comment about your son. I get confusion once in a while and forget who I’m talking to. It wasn’t meant as an insult.



Date: Tue, Mar 10, 2015 at 8:44 AM

You have the Airwaybill for the $6,700. Make the payment and contact Mr. Sean Philip for home delivery to your house.

David White.
Globe Couriers.


Date: Tue, Mar 10, 2015 at 9:36 PM


On the 2nd Wednesday of last Month, when my Social Security came in, CHAD GUY stuffed me in the linen closet and took my money. He always says, “I deserve some compensation for feeding you and taking you on walks all the time.” I can’t say I necessarily disagree… he has a point. But those checks are all I have, and not a reliable source of income anymore. I’m going to need to be more tricky.

BEATRICE and the boys give me a weekly allowance, but it doesn’t add up to much. Certainly not thousands of dollars. I think I could save $35/week, but that would take an eternity.

I might be able to sneak or borrow some from family, but I Have got to be careful. They tried to call the company and turn off my Internet Box. I think this time they’re gonna lock me away and put me in a home if they think I’m falling for a scam again. They told the Government about my early onset dementia. But this deal with you and AL JALIB will make up for all the scams I’ve fallen for in the past. Can you picture it? When I show up with my electronically sealed trunk boxes full of $24 million – why, they’ll change their tune real fast!

They’ve always been trying to keep me off the computer.  Whenever I got excited about what I found on the Internet, SHELDON would say “Dorothy – are you looking up pornography on that goddamned pervert machine again??” and I’d say “No, SHELDON. This is our ticket to the big time!!!” and he’d say, “Dorothy, the internet is lousy with Jews nowadays – don’t you dare put your digits in there!!” But I don’t believe him. There aren’t any Jews on the internet. That’s just Sheldon’s Way. But Sheldon’s not here to hold me back anymore. I can make my own decisions.

But wait a minute – I think I’m having an idea: The doctor’s say I need a PaceMaker for my heart arrhythmia. Bless their hearts, the kid’s have been saving up for one. They even have set up a fund for me (we need $35,000, can you believe that??) DAVID WHITE, is it a crime to borrow from the PaceMaker Fund if I will be a millionaire tomorrow?? I’d only be lying to them for a day or two. I can’t afford to not take their money…

We can figure this out. Don’t you give up on me DAVIE!

God Bless,

Chapter 2  Summary

– Omitted (6) emails from 2/25 – 3/2

– Dorothy is passed onto Mr David White. David asks for her phone number, and she supplies the number for the women’s shelter. David calls asking for her – they look through their records and say there is no record of Dorothy Yaeger ever staying there.

– Dorothy explains her situation. Mr Yaeger passed away years ago, and she coped by becoming an alcoholic. In AA, she met her future boyfriend – Chad Guy. Chad is 46 years younger than her. Dorothy tries to hide the money from him, but she forgets to logout of her computer. He finds out everything. He demands half of the money, and she refuses. Domestic abuse ensues. Dorothy cannot stay at home, so she stays with friends and at the women’s shelter. Due to confidentiality, the shelter could not disclose to Mr White that she was staying there.

– Finally the scam is revealed! David White informs her that her consignment has been deposited in a security vault storage facility. Once she pays $6,700, it will be released to her.

– Dorothy explains her financial situation. She lives off Social Security checks, but she can’t even rely on those because Chad Guy steals them. Beatrice and the boys give her an allowance, but it’s not enough. The children have started a PaceMaker fund for Dorothy for $35,000. She asks if she should steal from the fund to release the consignment.

– Co-written by Oh, hi Mark! Thanks Mark!

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